A new and modern tradition that has gained its reputation among many weddings is the wedding speech. As part of a family with the announcement of engagement and the big day making steps ahead, as one of the beloved family members, you might be asked by your daughter to hold a speech – and it is almost certain that she will ask you. If it is what you wanted to have a few words at your daughter’s wedding, now it is the time to show what talents are hidden in you. I’m sure that this favor shows how much she means to you.
But what do you do when you are asked to arrange and get involved in the wedding as a coordinator? Well, one thing is important besides all that fuss about the planning for the wedding, the flower arrangements and many other responsibilities that involve you as a mother, and that is the time that you allow yourself to have for preparing this speech.
The mother of the bride speech is one of the most thoughtful and well organized speeches that can be encountered, not to mention the amount of emotions you will have unavoidably. Things should rise up an atmosphere, in which every word is meant to last longer as well as the moment too. To write a meaningful speech, it depends a lot on the significance of the moment, how you perceive and imagine everything will be like. Even if you aren’t one of those famous female writers, you can still work your way with the words and create a true and real masterpiece. Find HERE 25 Speech Samples
The reasons that stay behind your speech are to be considered the main themes and topics from where you can choose one that you as a mother find suited to speak about. But there are cases when life chooses to have a word to say. Still, not to worry about a thing! Here are some useful tips for different situations when a mother has to present a mother of the bride wedding speech.
If it is the case of a late husband, then all your speech will have and is assumed to be structured in an emotional touch. Your job as a mother was all along to take care of your children, and raise them. By guiding your daughters, by guiding her steps and being next to her in various situations, you’ll become one of her best confidents and this is as important for you as it is for her.
The mother of the bride speech will have to be written in a natural way, with an accurate emotional balance since you don’t want to transform all of it into a regretful memory of your late husband. Her link with her father was very real and it meant a lot for her, as it means a lot for you.
It is not always easy in cases like this, but what is important is to keep in mind that you’ll have to describe her father in a great and funny light, like how amazing he was as a man and to describe how proud he was as a father regarding your daughter and not to offer a long grief description of the family and the rough moments you’ve been through. After all, it is one of the unique moments when two souls have a start on a new journey.
Another situation is when you as a mother will have to speak in the absence of your daughter’s father. If this is the case and the memory of this has a lot of negativity surrounding it, then you’ll probably avoid this topic. If you feel that it will have to be mentioned, then it will be wiser to keep it brief and mention fewer details. You can speak of him in the third person as her father, but as shortly as possible.
There can be many situations when you as a mother will be asked to speak if, for example, your husband is too shy to speak in front of an audience then you’ll have to fulfill his place and yours too. The most important tip that can be given in a situation like this is to make him feel involved by using the first person when you speak of you two as a couple. His feelings are lined up with yours and since you are a family, people should know that you both cherish your daughter a lot.
To avoid any confusion, you’ll have to be explicit why he couldn’t speak, a soft joke related to a tongue -check can be made without hurting his feelings, and people will understand how some individuals can be too overwhelmed by emotions and not to be able to speak in front of an audience.
Another situation can involve the fact that your daughter has asked you to speak at her wedding because you are a great speaker as your husband, and she wants you both have a few words and appreciations. However, you might want to make sure that you avoid that scenario when you candidate for the Oscar awards. After all, you are at your daughter’s wedding where your speech should be in a funny and informal manner close to the heart, short and concise.
Speak with your husband not to deliver the same speech message with the same story line, you can have great memories together and find story lines that will go well with the chosen theme. As a mother, you can speak of different things, other than the things mentioned by your husband, but at the same time keep it in a line of authenticity and originality.
Now comes the part where you actually have to write your speech. Here are some of the great and general ideas that mention how to write a masterpiece among the speeches. A lovely speech starts with great and original ideas. The first step that you’ll have to follow, after you’ve introduced yourself as the mother of the bride, will put the spotlight on all guests.
Welcome the guests
Many people assume that the speeches have their negative parts, since the experience has showed them that not all of this accustomed tradition has a great setting. But if you take time to write it down a few weeks earlier, rehearse it and memorize every word, all the things will go easily and you’ll have at the end of the day a memory that lasts.
So, let them with the sweet taste of doing all by the book. Acknowledge that their roads up to here were long, but you are very glad that they’ve managed to be here today and share with you a true union and a great love story. Welcome all of the guest, since the number of your guests can vary (as well as the age categories) and thus you will make them feel important and appreciated. You’ll see that they are more opened to what you have to say, even if in the past they had their share of negative speakers.
Even if your main topic is about your daughter you can add a few words about the one who has conquered her heart. Because if it is important for her, then it should make a difference for you too. By any means, do not make the mistake to not mention him since half of the audience has come from his side, and they might be anxious to hear what place he has in your life, how you see him.
You’ll find it suitable to welcome him in the family and talk about some short facts that really impressed you to see how he added some color to your daughter’s life. The obvious facts that you have noticed since they were together make the difference and there is nothing more touching and sincere than adding some of these in your speech.
Don’t forget the in-laws
One of the most important rules of diplomacy is to address a few words about your daughter’s in laws. It won’t be wise to speak or mention only your family and create a distance towards the in-laws from the beginning.
This is the perfect time to thank them for accepting your daughter as their own in their family and to mention any of their contributions to this event. They will appreciate it a lot, because you have noticed all these details.
Time is everything
One of the most encountered traps that can be found in the speech line is the time trap, in which a person will estimate that all the guests will have time to listen to long speeches. The main issue is that if you didn’t catch their attention in the first few seconds of your speech, then you have lost them.
The perfect time frame is comprised between five and six minutes, time during which you can make the show of your life. Motivate them to participate and not feel excluded. Invite them to be a part of what is going on by adding some humorous stories in which they will find themselves or their children, but with the right focus on your mother-daughter relationship.
Keep it short and really straight to the point. If you see that people are starting to get bored or they are starting to speak with each other, make your final statement and try to close up in a funny manner.
Since your speech is quite likely to be the first, avoid the trap of speaking too quickly, but take the right amount of pauses between the words, because that way you’ll let the emotions cover the guests’ hearts. Being a special occasion as well as the speech itself, people will expect tender and touching feelings.
The sentimental part should go up to a point, because you do not want to transform everything into a soap opera. You can let the guests know and feel how close you are to your daughter and how proud she has made you, but try to balance all with a little teasing to light all up.
Avoid formal and job speeches
As a mother, the whole content of this wedding involves the life of your daughter. Let her see you to realize how much you support and cherish her. These things can be expressed in an informal speech. You can let this feeling evolve on how proud you are of her by counting a few of her achievements, but avoid to turn the entire mother of the bride speech into a list of facts about your daughter and the chronological time of the events. In other words a mother of the bride speech must not be mentioned on the same page with your daughter’s biography or curriculum vitae.
Ask her closest friends
If you want to know your daughter better through other eyes you can ask details from her co-workers, her closest friends and add a few nice things there that might surprise her. You can ask some details about her first meeting with the one who later became her husband, what did she feel when she saw him.
Your daughter’s friends will have some good stories to tell you about her early years at school, as well as college and you can even ask her fiancée what he taught about her when he saw her for the first time. I’m sure that you can write a very good opinion mixed in your story line.
Talk with other speakers
Many times, the stories can be similar, so before you start speaking make sure that you had a little chat with the best man, the groom and your husband to make sure that there is no opportunity for frustration later. Cover different areas of your daughter’s life than those mentioned in their speech. Remember always that a great speaker adapts in many circumstances, this enabling him or her to say things of impact and to tell something of great value.
Your speech doesn’t have to be a fixed one; it just needs to impress and to be created in an authentic manner that will make a considerable impact.
The mother of the bride toast
The last part is the part where you take a glass and hold a toast, and if the father of the bride is absent then you can rest assured that you can easily toast for the bride and the groom, but in case he is present and if he intends to do this first, leave it to him. Otherwise, you can toast for friends and family, for those close and very dear who made themselves some free time to be present and share the big, happy day with the newlyweds.
A mother of the bride speech is full of true and sincere moments that can change the entire conception of many about the influence of a wedding speech. It is where at the end of a day your daughter will be proud to have a mother like you, who overcame her fears and emotions and made it all happen in the form of marvellous speech.
As you have read above, many things make a difference if you want to share a high quality mother of the bride speech. It is not just the attitude, your thoughts and your presentation but it is also about a past you had together with your daughter. Although in many families there are negative memories of a past relationship as well, these are never to be mentioned or elevated during a wedding speech such as a mother of the bride speech.
However, it is strongly encouraged for any mother to emphasize and to present how important it is for people to reach to a good decision, especially when it comes to marrying the right person. Even if you don’t agree and you thought another man would be the big “Him” for your daughter, you should keep your heart in peace and accept the fact that your daughter’s choice is best for her.
After all, what is often misunderstood is that a wedding speech can define all future family relationships. It is at many times the fault of parents or relatives to encourage giving a pessimistic speech, and then distance comes between family members who were once ready to protect each other and stand out for common or personal interests.
It is also important to know that the tips presented here are only idea starters. There is no such magic formula to define the best tips, or the best ideas to present a perfect mother of the bride speech. In fact, do you know how we could define what perfect means in such a context? It actually means that a perfect wedding speech can only be that one speech, which is highly appreciated by family members and at least 95% of the guests, who aren’t family. If that is your case – you can know you did a better job than any of those fiction novel writers, who claim to have written the most creative texts.
Dare to be different and dare to bring quality to your speech – people fail too many times, just because they were afraid to try out something, which seemed to be different or new (and this applies for mother of the bride speeches as well)!